i am very sorry i have not been posting here lately. i seem to be struggling more than i ever thought in just about every area of my life.
i have been back to the dr 2x for my bad knees and getting steroid shots and pain meds..i have approval to go see a ortho dr who maybe able to help..(scared i may need surgery) and hestitating calling for an appt.
my weight..same..i have good and i have bad days. my WLS of choice works but i dont
my job—is causing me a lot of stress…i cant sleep alot as i am thinking and over thinking everything…….micro managing is the worst and my new supervisor is about 22 and i have worked in my position for nearly 9 yrs and this person still asks me how to do something (along w/my co worker michelle who has been here with me about 7 yrs). she had her yr reviw recently and i am getting mine today…after hers, i cant wait to get mine….yes i am being sarcastic…when some people get a title, mgr or supervisor next to their name, it seems their head grows and they cant in the door.
so i am looking around for a job, soso results…hub wants me to stay and i want to go…i will continue to look and who knows maybe something will pop up..i am really letting this stress get to me big time
the other thing and its stupid..is that i cannot understand why i am so hard on myself…i blame myself for everything…i want that to stop.
after p hurt my feelings last yr *to which i have no idea why*, i have not been around my hubs mc friends (or their wives) much anymore…i am ashamed to say that none of them like any of my stuff on fb etc and that bothers me. WHY…i write that and feel like a 12 yr old cry baby. THIS is why i dont go around them drama
AND i am ashamed that i have gained weight back and i dont want them to laugh at me or make fun of my hub behind his back bc he is married to ms fat ass herself. (me)
and this my good friends, is what is on my mind just today…