Wa La …boom boom dandy

what part of this is hard.
the not eating?
the doing without?
the …..(you fill in the blanks)

eating is not bad and never will be.
however eating too much of something (esp if high calorie or junk laden foods)
are not the best choices. Every so often is fine and i am a strong opponent
for people to eat what they want but make choices as to how much and how often.

and YES i am pointing directly at myself
i love nothing more than sitting on a couch and eating BBQ chips
but i cannot do that….i did it way to often this past year and guess
what happened…..excess calories, no movement to burn any off and wala
weight gain

if i had to sit here and think i could never have this or that again..i would
go nuts…that sounds a lot like dieting to me and i dont want to diet no more.
why? it doesnt work. been there done that…most overweight people have.
i was a failure and a yo yo dieters for years. i retired from that.

eating to lose weight is the right thing to do
my WLS helps me with how much i can eat..if i eat too much, it does get very
uncomfortable. not hurt but def not a nice feeling. i ignored that for a long while.
yep i did..i was one who ate w/o regard to hurting myself and ate around the band.
that means eating junk food, sliders, and not the protein that i have to chew

getting the WLS i did helped me and then i stopped helping
and here is where i am now.

SO i am going about going back to what i know works.
walking (aka movement)
eating
drinking a lot (you’d be surprised that just drinking cold water or my SF peach tea)
helps conquer that thought you are hungry when in reality, we are just thirsty. #TRUTH

the part that is hard for me, is my self doubt and my self esteem
i feel like such a failure and i am so ashamed that i am battling that
aspect of this journey right now. i may have my body covered in tattoo’s and
piercings everywhere, but just one comment or one wrong wayward look would set me
back and make me go F**K It….i need to be stronger mentally to fight this battle
within and now that i am on my path to my journey (no end date until my last breath)
i need it more than ever

i must live/breath this 24/7

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About Banded Carolina Girl

NC girl getting healthy. Come visit me and say hello.
This entry was posted in acceptance, attitude, Basics, believe in yourself, calories, carolina girl, change, choose, courage, diet thinking, drinking, drinking water, eating and choices, exercise, feelings, head hunger, liquids, losing weight, moderation, movement, positive thinking, restriction, shame, stress, support, thinking, today, trying, walking, water, WLS, words. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Wa La …boom boom dandy

  1. ap0pl3xy says:

    You are so not alone. I was in Seroquel Hell for a while there and started eating again. I was at my lowest weight (DAMN I miss those skinny jeans!) and pretty soon I was up 20lbs. Then I had a thyroid problem, so I gained even more. (uh huh). Now I realize I’m craving and eating sugary CRAP and am nearly immune to dumping. I had to wake up and realize, its not just the Seroquel gain, its not just my thyroid at this point. Its ME. _I_ did this to myself. And all I can do is sit here and thinking WHY? Why would I do this? I felt so great before. Now I feel like crap and its so easy to slip into eat cause I’m depressed. Eat cause I ate when I was depressed. Just EAT EAT EAT. Now I’m a 135 woman with a 55lb meatsack on my back. You girl, are NOT alone in this.

    • GIRL…i could have wrote what you did…thanks for reaching out to me and letting me hear you… i did it to myself also and knowing exactly what i was doing when i was doing it and still doing it…why?? because i could and i said i would do better tomorrow…well tomorrow is here and i found myself in a world of mess and gained back alot of weight…well, is what it is..i am depressed…i am sickened and i had enough…

      dont feel like crap..feel like you are a winner because you are..WLS was a tool to help us..now we just have to get back to helping it…i will and i can and so will you…..we can do it together if you want….PS i love eating..the more the better….and the junkier the better…i am glad i am not alone and now, neither are you my friend…..

      we got this

      • ap0pl3xy says:

        Lets do this! My phych recommended Atkins, for weight loss and mood boost. I figure I’ll give it a go. No red meat for me (oh wait, I must have a protein style burger once in a while!) and lots of veggies. Induction is going to suck, but I feel ready. Want to give it a go? Once we get past induction phase we can add back more vegetables and some fruit (berries etc). Anyway, let me know…! I’m ready for some of this to come off PRONTO.

      • ap0pl3xy says:

        Aaand hello? take the 2nd half of that statement to me and apply it to YOURSELF girl! We are both winners… winners on the comeback trail!

  2. rschurbon says:

    Stay the path!

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