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Jan 5, 2016

i took a big step and made me a fill appt for this date.

i am trying to get an fluro before that time to ease my mind
as i can think myself into all sorts of things (conditions) etc….BUT i did it..

not happy about it dammit
BUT to get well, i need to face my demons head on
and the demon i hate most besides myself is ME

i do not want to weigh as i know it is up
my clothes let me know that

i am ashamed
i am embarrassed
i feel like a failure

i had WLS and i even failed that…

how sad

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21 thoughts on “Jan 5, 2016

  1. Stay strong! If the weight is up, then don’t think of it as failure, take it as a bump in the road. Breathe deep, get back on that wagon and move forward. Beating ourselves up will not help. Excepting facts, working through them and moving forward is what is going to help. See, I have got the psychological side of dieting down, I just can’t make myself follow my own advise… At least you’ve gotten through and accomplished so much already. Me? I’m afraid to even take the first steps, because I’m so sure I will fail.

    • OH its up …..and i guess a bump in road is a good expression.it is what it is.. you are right i can bitch about it all day long and whine this and that but unless i do something about it, it wont change

      the first step is the hardest..now i am doing it again..that is what many people with weight issues do..over and over..but i found that first step hardest is BS……what is hard is brushing myself off and getting back on that track that i took the first step on…

      to fail means to stop trying
      if you havent stopped trying, you havent failed

      Henrika, what say you??

      • I haven’t stopped trying, I don’t think it even is an option to be honest… But I’m a) trying not to be so hard on myself and b) trying to stress less about the weight. Life is stressful enough and as so many specialists say stress doesn’t really mix and match with weight loss.

      • i need to be more like you and not be so hard on me as i am the best enemy i ever can be to myself..i dont think stress makes me gain as its me eating way more cals than i can burn off that makes me gain but stress does make me so miserable that i turn to food to make myself feel better..so i guess stress does make me gain LOL….good i can blame it on someone else besides me hahaha

        we just got to do good today..cant change yesterday or worry bout tomorrow as its not here yet…it will be soon enough however

        we can do this

  2. It’s all good. You are taking the steps necessary to correct the bump in the road. Henrika is right, just get up, dust yourself off and carry on. You haven’t failed, you haven’t given it enough time to be a failure girl! Git, Shoo! Get on with yourself, you know what to do! Get to it!

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