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food-gasm

i went in there bound and determined to get me a fill so i can eat less and lose 1 zillion pounds..and then he said something that made me go, WHAT

why would i give you a fill if you dont eat the better choice foods?

it would serve no purpose. and he was RIGHT..

so he said i do not need a fill at this time (*which pissed me off as i wanted one*). he said you will get one when i truly need one..

he said i have a tool that is helping me eat less and it was up to me to make the decision of what to eat..some days are better than others BUT what matters is i keep going/moving forward..

he said things happen in peoples lives, stress, life in general and it causes stress and people overeat or they drink or they do drugs or they whatever…

my chosen path is and has always been to overeat…it makes me feel better even for one food-gasm second and then afterwards we feel like shit…a failure…..((ie: me and how i have been feeling lately))

the person who will help me lose weight is ME

the person who will hinder my weight loss is ME

IT IS up to me…

he said a fill helps a person if they help it..some want it to tight they cant eat/drink and yes they lose weight but what type of life is that to live..although some enjoy living that way..not me, i like to eat and enjoy not worrying about getting stuck etc (which the dr said again to me today is the person is either too tight and also takes a too big of bite and doesnt chew welll or a combo of sorts of all that..)…and hence the slime..granted i have no idea but i trust him and what he said….so he said to eat, go slow, chew a lot…protein first…drink a lot (still no carbonation and havent in over 2 1/2 years) and exercise and you cant/wont go wrong..

so the fluro xray was fine…band looks good and healthy as i do worry/fret so over that as i know i have eaten more than my allotted amount several times but the band ALWAYS says enough is enough…

so let me say, enough is enough…pull your wedges on and big girl panties (thanks debbie3sons and eye candy to remind me to wear underwear) and get on with it..

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